The fuckboy vs softboy

Quickly, I’m going to define fuckboy first because it’s simple in my mind: younger Millennials decided to take the word “player” and make it their own. Call it neediness, attention seeking behavior, lack of imagination, immaturity and what have you from those born from 1990 and on. The fuckboy is a tool, literally, seeking only one thing from another person: sex. Sporting the latest hairstyle for men, snazzy threads, intense/charismatic demeanor and mastery of flattering words, this guy is easy to spot (not only just because his Type A personality has drawn a crowd around himself and his entourage) at nightclubs, bars and coffeehouses. There’s no deeper ulterior motive behind his actions and he’s screwed the day he fathers a daughter (or son) because “sins of the father visiting on his children” and all that. The fuckboy will use you to satisfy his sexual needs and ego but he’ll leave your heart alone. In every major women’s magazine touting to cover fashion, make up tips and dating advice there will be at least one quiz a publication year to help someone figure out if indeed, they have slept with a fuckboy (i.e. confirming players gonna play in the summary evaluating your score 😉 ).

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Unfortunately, once a cheater

NOT always a cheater. If you have been deceived by a lover in the worst way, that is to say your belief and trust in love was violated, then, I’m sure you find some comfort that Karma will be a bitch and your ex lover will fall. We do unto others as we would do unto ourselves and we get what’s coming to us. Perhaps, telling yourself, as your friends and family have told you, a cheater can’t change and is destined for loneliness brings some solace; I know that to be untrue from personal experience on both sides.

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You should know I’ve never been the type of person who relied on her looks or used them to an unfair advantage. My mother forbade me to use make up before the age of 16, by which point, I didn’t have the same interest to use or perfect using beauty products as I did when I was say, 10 or 12. Even now, it’s still very basic make-up applications using only lip gloss/liner and mascara to highlight my best features. Mostly, I’ve gotten by on my intelligence and charisma, alone, all these years and never really got to gauge what it is that attracts strangers and acquaintances to me. Often, I’m surprised at the lengths to which men and women will go to fulfill my request(s) but it’s extremely helpful when I need something (assistance or product) outside business rules and social expectations. Today was one of those occasions.

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